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Sunday, April 12, 2015

Why Shrek Would Be One Friendly Nurse

If you are looking to hire a nurse, I know just the right person.

Here he is. Let me give you a rundown of his resume and 4 reasons why he would benefit you.

Number 1. Shrek is extremely hygienic. Look at him! He wears a mask as a safety precaution while he is dealing with the dragon and treating her fire breath. And remember when Fiona wanted to pull the arrow out of Shrek’s bottom? Shrek doesn’t let her. Why? Because pulling the arrow out may lead to the spread of blood born diseases. Clean enough for you?

Number 2. He knows how to entertain kids. Shrek understands the mechanics of making an awesome balloon. And if kids have a party in the playroom, Shrek is a wild party animal. Imagine how wild the kids will be when they Shrek screams as he does in Shrek Forever After.

Number 3. He will stand up for the rights of his patient and the facility. Look, when the swamp was overcrowded, Shrek goes to Lord Farquaad to fight for the right of the swamp in hopes of making it less crowded. And do you remember all those knights that he had to scare away? He did that all to make people stay away so that he could take care of others and himself.


Number 4. Shrek is a master of getting people to do what he wants. Don’t believe his skills? How about when he got Donkey to do this [crossing the bridge]? If that isn't some epic jedi sublimal skills, I don't know what is.

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