Some Fast Food Logic

Here's a math problem for you.

People can buy one Big Mac for approximately $5. Let's say, on a scale of 1-10, with 1 being starving like a giraffe, and 10 being stuffed like a turkey, they Big Mac fills you up to a level of 7.

Now, I usually like to buy 3 McDoubles. Each McDouble costs $1.69, which comes to a total of $5.07. If I shove all three burgers down my throat, I fill up to a 12, which is stuffed like a dead turkey. So, why do people buy a Big Mac and not get filled up when they can buy 3 McDoubles and save one for later?

Song of a Sleepless Child Part 2

Let their undead legions come

I am living, they are dead

The fire of my heart will engulf them in my flames of courage

My fists, my flames

My room, my rules

My battle, my victory

I see their horns, I smell their breathe, I hear their roars

The first hand tries to grab me

I burn the hand off its body

Hands ascend from underneath the bed

The closet shakes with legions

The owl screams in fear

Flames surround my fists

My room burns in my eternal blaze

Let the war begin

Song of a Sleepless Child Part 1

Two minutes ago, the clock struck midnight
The owl perched on the rooftop
As if it was in the moon's spotlight
A scream, and the owl jumped with a hop

Don't worry, just go to sleep
You did not hear a screaming sound
It was probably just a lonely sheep
Go to sleep and don't look around

Still can't enter your nightly slumber?
Do you know what happens when you are awake?
They come in endless numbers
Making sure you will never wake

I Will Never Eat a Fortune Cookie Again

I opened a fortune cookie the other day. 

There was nothing inside of it.

What am I suppose to make of this?

Is my future empty? Is my future a mystery? Maybe my future is sweet and delicious, just like the fortune cookie.

I hate it when I don't get answers. At least tell me something so I don't get bored. What a waste of a fortune cookie. What happens if the next fortune cookie I open was also empty? Would that mean that my life will become pitch black bleak?

To avoid all the troubles of seeing another empty fortune cookie, I decide not to open another one. I think I'll rather spend my money on something like Oreos.

A Marvelous Use of a Credit Card Besides Emptying Your Bank Account

It sucks when I pull out my credit card. I always realize that this piece of plastic really means nothing besides my poor bank account and big fat zero that comes with it. What am I to do with this piece of plastic? I will give you an idea of what you can do with it.

You know, in the morning when you take out your slice of bread and jam, and try to spread the jam with a knife, it does not get spread out evenly. I hate it when this happens. But when I used my credit card as the spreader, the jam spread evenly onto the whole slice of spread. I don't know why, but hey! it made feel happy myself.

The Darkness of a Superhero Part 3

Now, consider a superhero, and this time, he or she is truly a superhero, like the Marvel and DC ones.

He or she has saved your city from many villains and crime. They have done everything possible to stop the city from crumbling. The question is, " How long can this superhero keep this up for? How long will their good hearts and pure souls last until they finally start thinking that 'maybe evil cannot be vanquished with good. To vanquish evil itself means to be evil yourself and to kill others with no mercy. Only then would other evils learn to fear you.' "

This is a scary thought. Many people go to places with a pure heart, but come out with their hearts tainted. I am scared of these people. I think you need to worry about these people too. Sometimes they forget why they do something, and end up doing something that does not reflect their true core values.

Thank you for journeying with me through the hearts of superheroes. 

Anatomy and Confidence

I realized something about my confidence: it was low. Now, it did not have anything to do with me being shy of talking or anything. In fact, I have a simple solution to solve all confidence problem. Ready.

Push your lower back forward and pump your chest out while pulling back your shoulder blades. As a result, your chin will tilt upwards, forcing your eyes to stop looking at your feet, but instead stare straight forward. You won't believe how much more confident you will get from having your eyes looking forward all the time. You will learn to look into people's eyes. You will learn to smile at familiar faces. But most importantly, feel your confidence grow.

Good Thing I Had a Little Brother

During one of volunteering journeys with Kindergarten students, something spectacular happened. There was a boy. I took him to the washroom. He goes inside the stalls to do his business. Then he opens the door and looks at me with tears in his eyes. I did not know what was wrong. Maybe he wet his pants? Maybe the toilet is scaring him? I analyzed the stall, and soon came to realize that he took a number two, but didn't know how to use the toilet paper to wipe himself afterwards. 

So, I guess I had to help wipe him. Fortunately, I had helped my youngest brother do the same thing. Thank goodness for my brother. Who knows what I would have done if I had not experience this toilet horror story before.

The Darkness of a Superhero Part 2

Continuing on from last week's discussion of superheroes.

Let us consider another scenario. You are part of an organization where everyone works together. You have an awesome leader, who is an awesome superhero. She makes everything run smoothly. Now, imagine if she retires or decides to leave the organization. Who will be the next leader?

It could be you. It could be a senior manager. It could be another superhero of yours. Unless there was some sort of selection process occurring, how else do you think the next leader will be decided? I can't say what would happen. All I will say is that a new leader will be picked, but he or she may not be picked in the most peaceful and fair way. Understand that people are kind to others, but when some sort of trigger is pulled, those kind people turn into things we may not recognize.

The Darkness of a Superhero Part 1

No, this is not a post about Marvel or DC superheroes, so if that's what you were looking for, this is not the place.

The superheroes I want to discuss are those that inspire and watch over us, whether it be our managers or a mentor. Most of them are great people. However, they will always be a few rotten beasts hiding somewhere. They are the ones I want to discuss.

To make my writing easier to understand, whenever I say the word superhero, I am referring to role models, mentors, and other people that have influenced your lives.

Imagine yourself an intern at a company. You will be working for a high ranking official in that company. He is to watch over you, supervise you, and give you tips as to how to best solve problems. Sounds great? In most cases, yes, it is great. Consider this: he is not just supervising you. There's a catch to all of this. What he's doing is training you in a way so that you can one day replace him.

Does he want that? Of course not. So watch for him. He'll do everything possible to get rid of you. Now, on the bright side, if he gets promoted at the same time you do, then there's no need for him to harm you. This may not be the case when he's about to get fired and he knows it.

Alone? Not a Problem

So, you’re all alone? No one to help you practice a new language? No one to spar with you? No one to practice a duet with you? Not a problem, here is a list of simple ways to work with yourself and improve:

1) Talk to yourself.

This is especially good when you’re learning a new language. Sometimes, what you can do, is pick a random topic, and just talk about it. Think of it as an impromptu speech, except you’re speaking in a different language other than English. This method forces you to think of new vocabulary you’ve learned and their pronunciation.

2) Smart phones.

This is a really easy method that not many people utilize. Film yourself doing something. Then re-watch yourself afterwards. The benefit of this method is that you can watch and re-watch yourself. You can analyze every bit of detail and understand yourself to a different level.

3) YouTube

I can’t speak for other disciplines, but for martial arts, I have found some videos where somebody simulates padwork drills. Even when I’m alone, I can watch this video and do padwork with the person in the video. Even though this is not as effective as having a real person with you, it nonetheless is still better than not doing padwork.

What other ways do you use to improve yourself when you’re alone?

Musical Theory

The type of music you listen to and when you listen to it dictates a lot of things. Why does a certain song sound so amazing one day, but sound terrible the next? Sometimes, your mood and emotions play a critical role in how much you like a song.

When I felt depressed, listening to slow songs did not help. In fact, what helped me was listening to loud music. This created a sense of power within me. It resonated so strongly that it gave me strength. Fast forward to a week later when I felt awesome because I performed great on an exam. I listened to that loud music again, but I did not feel all that powerful. I simply skipped it on my playlist and listened to something else.

So, the next time you listen to music, consider what type of music might make your day extra special.

The Truth behind Happiness

I cry. I cry a lot. When I failed an exam, I cried. When I did something stupid, I cried. When a fight happens, I cry.

Over time, I realized why I cried. It was because I was scared of all the bad things that happened around me. I couldn’t control when they were going to happen. I was afraid that I would have to awkwardly observe these bad things happen.

Then I realized something. These bad things happen for a reason. They may be out of my control, but that doesn’t mean I have to cry. I can instead stare at the situation and observe. Observe what happened. Observe how it happened. Observe why it happened. Maybe I can learn something about it. Maybe the bad things occur because they are trying to teach me something.

Maybe, all these negative situations surround me because they are an obstacle to true happiness.

Frustrations of Learning a Language

Learning a language can go one of three ways: you work hard and learn the language well, you work on it once in a while and know the language to a limited extent, or you completely forget how to say hello in that language.

I found that the best way to learn a language was to ask myself: “Why do I want to learn this language?” To impress others? To improve business or political relationships? A hobby or passion? Just like anything else in life, we must find a passion to learn something. I believe that we should not just learn a language, but rather learn it well. Once we reach that point, not only do we acquire a new skill, we can look back and feel satisfied at all the heart and determination it took to accomplish this daunting task.

A few years ago, I was trying to learn Mandarin. For those who have tried to learn Mandarin, you must understand the difficult in trying to listen to all those tones. I could not distinguish a second tone from a first tone. When someone says something to me in Mandarin, I shake nervously because I could not understand a single sound they made. You know what kept me going? It was my hatred for those tones that kept me going. I was not going to stop until I could hear those tones. I would rather die trying to learn those tones than to give up.

Eat Your Fruits and Vegetables

Have you asked yourself whether or not ten years from now you will enjoy the bite of an apple? Or the crunchiness of a stalk of celery?

Don’t wait until tomorrow to eat your fruits and vegetables. Eat them today! Why wouldn’t you want to live a happy life?

Still not convinced? Okay, let me give you a science lesson. Have you ever heard of vitamin E? Vitamin E is something your body does not synthesize, so you must consume it. Its role is a biological antioxidant? What does that mean? Well, your body contains lots of reactive oxygen species. These species may cause various effects. In case you're wondering, yes, these species may cause cancer. So, how do you combat them? Well, EAT YOUR VITAMIN E.

I hope you will eat your fruits and vegetables now. If not, you know the consequences.

Why Shrek Would Be One Friendly Nurse

If you are looking to hire a nurse, I know just the right person.

Here he is. Let me give you a rundown of his resume and 4 reasons why he would benefit you.

Number 1. Shrek is extremely hygienic. Look at him! He wears a mask as a safety precaution while he is dealing with the dragon and treating her fire breath. And remember when Fiona wanted to pull the arrow out of Shrek’s bottom? Shrek doesn’t let her. Why? Because pulling the arrow out may lead to the spread of blood born diseases. Clean enough for you?

Number 2. He knows how to entertain kids. Shrek understands the mechanics of making an awesome balloon. And if kids have a party in the playroom, Shrek is a wild party animal. Imagine how wild the kids will be when they Shrek screams as he does in Shrek Forever After.

Number 3. He will stand up for the rights of his patient and the facility. Look, when the swamp was overcrowded, Shrek goes to Lord Farquaad to fight for the right of the swamp in hopes of making it less crowded. And do you remember all those knights that he had to scare away? He did that all to make people stay away so that he could take care of others and himself.

Number 4. Shrek is a master of getting people to do what he wants. Don’t believe his skills? How about when he got Donkey to do this [crossing the bridge]? If that isn't some epic jedi sublimal skills, I don't know what is.

How Video Games Suck Out Your Uncreativeness

I can only speak from my personal experiences, and the judge of whether my words are true rests on your shoulders. As a kid, I loved playing video games, reading comic books, and watching TV. In fact, I did these 3 things so much that I never did my homework or studied. With that being said, did that make me any less smart or did it in any way squash my potential to have been great? Nope. In fact, it was perhaps these three things that made me who I am today. I feel more creative, smarter, and can think faster because of those activities.

But let’s face it. I still wouldn’t consider myself successful. Sure I am more creative or smarter, but I seem to be progressing slower than usual. Others seem to be getting higher grades or accomplish feats much more glorious than anything I could possibly have done.

Should I lessen the time I spend playing video games, passively reading comic books, and going on Netflix? The answer is yes and no.

Yes, because sometimes those 3 things provide too much of a distraction to oneself that it takes away from one’s real work. If I am always online, I may not have time to do homework.

No, because we can transcend to the next level of gaming, reading, and TV watching. You see, there is a way for me to interact with the things I love without being distracted. All you have to do is innovate.

Innovate? What is that supposed to mean? Think about this: when you are gaming, you are actively playing out a role or exploring a map that someone else has designed for you. Your imagination and power is limited only to that world. But what happens if you were the person creating the game? That flips everything around. Instead, you are the person designing the world. Your imagination and power is unlimited.

It is not the act of playing games that make you smarter, but rather the act of going one step further and creating something out of your passion and love for a hobby. That’s what makes you successful.

3 Best Weapons Against An Alien Invasion

It could happen today. It could happen tomorrow. It could happen 100 years after our generation. If we don’t prepare for it, we will be exterminated from the planet. Do we want to leave our planet open for alien destruction? If not, I have three weapons that can be used against the alien invasion.

Giants

No, we’re not referring to the giants from Jack and the Beanstalk. We’re talking about the giants from Pacific Rim. But the difference between the Pacific Rim Jaegers and our robots, is that we don’t have to limit ourselves to rocket powered punches, explosives, and blades. Why, we can use deadly acids, nuclear weapons, and even biological weapons. I’m sure the giant robots we will be making can shoot missiles out of their chests and knock out an entire alien fleet.

Quantum Teleportation

You know, quantum mechanics has gone to point where they are considering teleporting people from one place to another. If this technology does become real, we will have a weapon of our own. Imagine one person against a fleet of aliens. All he or she has to do is teleport around each alien and destroy them one by one. The aliens can’t hit our one person army, but our one person army can annihilate an entire battalion.

Music Fest

Have we ever consider the possibility that the alien soldiers are tired of invading other planets? Maybe they just want to go home to their families. In other words, they are demoralized. Why not demoralize them even more with music? They’ll be shaking their bodies so much they’ll forget about invading Earth.

Keep these possibilities in mind in case an alien invasion occurs. Share these ideas with friends and families, and see what they will use to defend themselves against invaders.

The Biggest Mistake With Eating Ice Cream

“That kid is so smart.”

“I wish I had an iPhone! I want one myself.”

“Look at that guy. He owns several houses and some of the sickest cars in the world.”

It’s definitely disappointing when we see someone else with something we want. What makes us more upset is that we will never get our hands on it. How we wish we could be like them.

I would like to shed a different perspective on things. So, you think that person you envy lives an awesome life?

Let’s say you are poor. You see somebody who’s wealthy. They eat ice cream every day. Saliva drools from your mouth. If only you could have one bite of that vanilla ice cream. If only they would let you lick their chocolate sundae.

Want to know something? I’m a rich man. I will buy you a lifetime’s supply of ice cream. Sounds good? Alright. Here’s a mint chocolate ice cream cone.

You devour the cone in a minute. Want another one? Sure, here you go. You devour this one in less than a minute. You know what, I know you love ice cream. Look behind me. Here is a truck full of ice cream. Dig in!

After about a day, you sit in the empty truck with the empty ice cream containers. But I know you love ice cream. Here is another truck full of ice cream. What? You don’t want ice cream anymore? You feel terrible? You have cavities? Nonsense. C’mon! Just one more truckload of ice cream. You’re living like that kid who you envied a day ago. Isn’t this what you wanted?

Never assume someone lives an awesome life on the basis on the pleasure they derive of materialism. As George Bernard Shaw once stated, “The man with the toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. The poverty stricken man makes the same mistake about the rich man.”

Why Your Life 'Ain't So Bad'

We all have had times where we tell ourselves “Why me!” or “I don’t want to do this!” I understand that we don’t have time to do other things or we simply hate doing what we’re asked. I hate doing chores. But do you know what motivates me to do them even when I hate it? I overcame this by asking myself three simple questions.

“How does cleaning the washroom sound to you?”

The question I most fear coming from my mom. There are germs and creepy little things crawling the washroom. Now that I think of it, my chores include washing the dishes, doing laundry, and vacuuming. These ain’t so bad compared to cleaning the toilet. I don’t want to deal with Mr. Clean and the toilet plunger.

“Would you rather become too poor to afford food?”

I can’t possibly imagine myself go hungry. And that’s great! Thinking of this statement made me realize how fortunate I am to live in a country where I’m well fed. The least I could do to alleviate the burden on my parents is to do some chores. Chores ain’t that bad when I compare it to the possibility of being too poor to afford food.”

“Are you really suffering as badly as war-torn countries?”

Chores ain’t near the level of badness of war. Think of it this way: there are millions of people who are dying and suffering from war. The suffering and pain I get from chores is nowhere near the level of war-torn countries. Again, my chores ain’t so bad.

Whenever you tell yourself “Why me!” or “I don’t want to do this!” ask yourself the three simple questions. That will allow you to see how little your problem is compare to other things. Hopefully, you can motivate yourself and others to do their work.

What questions do you ask yourself to motivate yourself to do work?

Why Pikachu Would Be One Awesome Undercover Agent

If you are looking to hire an undercover agent, I know just the right person.

Let me give you 4 reasons why he would benefit you.

Number 1. Pikachu is the best assassin in the world. Imagine a room full of men dress in suits, wearing sparkling watches and rings. Do you believe Pikachu can knock out everyone at once? Do you know how? All he has to do is do one of these [thunderbolt].

Number 2. Imagine meeting Pikachu on the streets. Isn’t he just adorable? He will charm just about anybody. What better way to get close to the target than to charm him or her? Nobody can resist him. Then what? Well, Pikachu may look cute and adorable, but when he gets his game on [evil Pikachu]…Anyways, moving on

Number 3. You don’t have to worry about Pikachu getting too close to his targets and starting an actual relationship with them. Pikachu does not have a change of heart. Remember all those times when Pikachu and Meowth got lost together? Pikachu saves him, but when Meowth tries to lead the way, Pikachu simple ignores him. No pity for Meowth. No friendship for Meowth. Pikachu maintains the same hostility towards Meowth.

And just imagine what is going through Pikachu’s mind. Maybe chuck Meowth off the cliff? Leave him in the forest with other wild beasts? Or perhaps something more sinister [evil Pikachu]…

Number 4. Underneath all that friendliness, Pikachu has many henchmen he charmed to work for him. Look at these! Are you sure Pikachu is best friends with Piplup? And how about Bunneary? I’m confident that if Pikachu just speaks, Bunneary would be begging Pikachu to let her help him on his quest.

If you think Pikachu would be one awesome undercover agent, please leave a comment. Thank you for reading and I’ll see you next time.

Am I Really That Epic?

So…how exactly do you know I’m qualified to help you smash the challenges of your life into bits of dust? The funny thing, is….

That there really are no qualifications that require you to listen to me.

The judge of my posts will be you. You decide whether or not you are changing your life based on what you’ve read. You decide whether my posts will help educate humanity. But most importantly, only you will know whether your soul has grown a little from reading my blog.

I am learning every day. I want to share my experiences with you. I hope by reading this blog, you will not only gain more experience and become smarter, but also find motivation to spark the superhero within you.

Smile and clap!

Epic Bonanza

About

            ‘Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion.
            I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterwards.’
                                                                                                            ~ Kurt Vonnegut

The blog's name says it all.

Whether you are all about educating humanity, changing other people and your life, or simply looking for some motivation, use this site as a resource. This blog is a compilation of things that I feel will help you cope with the horrors of life. What horrors? It can range from something as simple as telling you about my television malfunctioning to something complex like the universe. Every problem has a solution. All we have to do is break through the creativity block and smash the challenges into bits of dust. Remember, in the end, all that matters is that we keep growing and smiling.

 Still not convinced about me? You can find more by clicking Epic!